Quick Service by PG Wodehouse

Author:PG Wodehouse [Wodehouse, PG]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Humour, Classics
ISBN: 9781841591285
Goodreads: 929827
Publisher: Everyman
Published: 1940-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

"Still here?"

"Just going. Tell me, my dear Chibnall, would you describe this as one of Claines Hall's ordinary nights? I merely want to know what to expect."

.

"Took you quite a time to close that window."

"No, no. I did it like a flash. But I was then engaged in conversation by the lady who has just left us. Are you really going to sleep in here?"

"I am."

''I'll bet you're not. You won't get a wink. I've tried dossing in chairs myself. No, what you ought to do, my dear fellow," said Joss winningly, "is to toddle back to your little bed and curl up your pink toes. Nobody will know."

"Thank you. I prefer to do my duty."

"Oh. Well, in that case, good night."

"Good night."

As Joss made his way to the library he was finding the atmosphere too heavily charged with mystery for comfort. Chibnall had been mysterious. So had Mrs Chavender. Mrs Chavender's mysteriousness would no doubt shortly be explained, but there seemed no hope of penetrating the inscrutability of the butler. At the Rose and Crown that morning and right through the day Chibnall had been all that was cordial and friendly, and now he was a changed man, curt in his speech and showing a tendency to shoot sharp, sidelong glances. Joss found it puzzling.

The enigmatic attitude of Chibnall, however, could wait. The immediate subject on the agenda paper was the enigmatic attitude of Mrs Chavender. It was with a lively desire for enlightenment that he entered the library.

"Oh, there you are," said Mrs Chavender. "Shut the door."

Joss shut the door.

"Sit down."

Joss sat down.

"Now where were we?" said Mrs Chavender.

Joss was able to refresh her memory.

"You had begun by saying that you were not surprised to find me on the premises because Miss Fairmile had told you I was here. Is her name really Sally? Capital, capital. A delightful name.

One of my favourites. It's positively amazing," said Joss, warming to his subject, "how everything seems to be working out, as if I had had it done to my specifications. She's beautiful. She has a lovely voice. And her name's Sally. Not a flaw in the setup as far as I can see."

Mrs Chavender seemed perplexed.

"Would you mind telling me what, if anything, you're talking about?"

"I should have mentioned," Joss explained, "that I love this young Fairmile. It hit me like the kick of a mule the instant I saw her. Romeo had the same experience. And Chibnall."

"Oh. Well, we can go into that later."

"Any time that suits you," said Joss courteously. "Well, after saying that you were not surprised to find he here you added the words : 'And I know . . .' At that point you· heard Chibnall coming and switched off. You never did get around to telling me what it was that you knew."

"Well, I'll tell you now. I know why you're here. Jimmy Duff sent you to swipe that portrait."

"What an extraordinary idea."

"Is it? Well, let me tell you I've had the whole story from an authoritative source.

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