Down Down Deep by Christina Delay
Author:Christina Delay [Delay, Christina]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00
16
JESSE
GABE WALKS me back to the suite, slowly, as if Iâm easily breakable. My spine straightens, and I want to tell him that Iâm not an invalid, but then he might take away his hand, and Iâm starting to crave his touch.
He stops in front of the door. âThink youâll be okay from here?â The question is a tease, and a smirk tips his lips.
âI think I got it.â
âSo much for our fun day.â He shrugs, and his expression is so disappointed-little-boy that I laughâwhich hurts.
âHey, the dayâs not over yet. Iâve still got items on my list, and I need your help to do them.â My voice sounds like a horde of hornets, buzzy and harsh.
Gabeâs gaze softens, and I lean into him, crossing that physical boundary once again, letting him know that itâs okay that he does too. He picks up on my non-verbal and strokes my arm with the back of his finger. âWhatever you need, whenever you need. Just give me the word.â
My lips spread into a smile, and I can tell they are dry, chapped, in major need of lip gloss, but under his gaze, itâs not a crisis. âIf Iâd known all it took was almost drowning to get your attention, I would have arranged this years ago.â
His eyes widen. âJesseâ¦youâve always had my attention.â
âNot like this.â I find his hand, place my palm flat against his, and bring it up between us. His hand swallows mine, but itâs not threatening. Not at all.
He pulls me in and wraps both his arms around me, kisses the top of my head. âNot like this,â he echoes, and Iâm not sure I want to decipher the sadness I hear in his voice. âRest up and call me whenever youâre ready.â He squeezes my hand then leaves, his broad shoulders commanding the space in the narrow hallway.
The stateroom door barely closes before Momma jumps up and grabs me by the chin, eating away at the peace I found in Gabeâs arms.
âIâm fine. Just took in some water.â I back away from her prodding hand. Sheâs not good at mothering, and Iâm not good at accepting.
âDonât tell me you tried to kill yourself.â She crosses her arms over her protruding belly, jiggling in a one-piece orange swimsuit that was stretched out ten years ago. It takes up all the visual energy in the room, like a construction barrel thatâs survived a ten-car pile-up.
âI didnât try to kill myself.â I donât roll my eyes, but itâs all there in my tone.
âOh, my Jesse-girl. How sad your little life is. To think about killing yourself while on vacationââ She interrupts herself to have a dramatic moment. Her words drip with sticky, sugary lies. I used to lick them up and swallow them down as love and acceptance, but Iâve lost my taste for her sweets.
I turn my back, and this time, I roll my eyes. âWe both know you couldnât care less about my well-being.â I drop the bag I was about to fill with ice and clink two cubes in a whiskey glass instead.
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