Parenting Bright Kids Who Struggle in School by Dewey Rosetti

Author:Dewey Rosetti
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sourcebooks

The Path for My Daughter

Rowing crew cleared the path to college for Melissa. My sister was a high school counselor at the time Melissa was looking at colleges, and she passed on multiple lists of small, Division III schools with rowing teams. To my dismay, Melissa tore the lists up. She told me she was already talking to several rowing coaches who had been reaching out to her. Princeton was one of the schools, as well as UC Berkeley, much to my surprise and pleasure. When she told me that she had talked to the Princeton coach about her dyslexia and that together they decided UC Berkeley was a better choice for her, I decided to back out of the process once and for all. She clearly had this covered.

When Melissa was offered the opportunity to row for UC Berkeley, my husband and I were thrilled to have her close by. Although the size and scope of this world-class research university was quite a shift for her, she was able to keep up with her studies and her athletics with help from tutors. Now in her late 20s, Melissa has surprised us all yet again—she has turned her attention to the family business, learning real estate (hands-on, of course) at her father’s elbow. Like me, she isn’t cut out for a desk job, and this business context utilizes her natural gifts and her innate craving for excitement.

Her pathway has been different from the one that I would have drawn when I held her as a baby. Looking back, I wouldn’t have it any other way, and I am grateful I never used the tactic of denying her permission to participate in her favorite sports as a means of punishing her for not doing better in her academics—that would have been a disaster.

My daughter now has true ownership of her life and career. She has struggled, triumphed, and never taken her success for granted. She understands herself deeply and is able to explain herself to others. She is tough and talented. Above all, she is able to empathize with the people she meets. She knows that even though things may appear perfect on the surface, many people are struggling in ways that aren’t obvious to the casual observer. She has lived this experience and knows it to be true.

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