Moon Shots (Vampire for Hire) by J. R. Rain

Author:J. R. Rain [Rain, J. R.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Rain Press
Published: 2020-05-07T22:00:00+00:00

~~~~~

“Have a seat.”

“Thank you. You work from your home?”

“I do, yes.”

“Aren’t you worried about bringing riffraff into your home?”

“I did initially. But money was tight. A home office seemed the way to go. If some potential clients seemed a little off, I met them at Starbucks.”

“And you could tell they were off just by talking to them over the phone?”

“That, and running their names in my proprietary database. Oh, and since I had already been a vampire by the time I started my PI business, I used the little warning bell inside my head to let me know if a potential client could be trusted in my home or not. I considered it my advanced asshole warning system.”

“Did you say vampire?”

“I did, yes.”

“Is that because I can expect to have my bank account sucked dry by the time I’m done hiring you?”

“Cute, but no. I charge fair rates and often give my clients the answers they seek earlier than expected. If that happens, I refund the unused retainer.”

“I take it I didn’t set off your warning bells?”

“No, and dial it back, bub. I have a werewolf boyfriend. Plus, I tend to make love slaves out of mortals.”

“How do you know I’m not a vampire, too? Or a werewolf?”

“I know.”

“How?”

“You have an aura, and I can hear your heart beating in your chest, and I can read your mind.”

“You can read minds?”

“Only the minds of mortals.”

“I see. What am I thinking now?”

“You are thinking about your social security number.”

“Which is?”

“343-726-2978.”

“Okay, wow. No, wait. You said you research clients before you meet them. You likely already know my social security number.”

“Likely.”

“This is so weird.”

“Tell me about it.”

“The thing is... you guessed that I was thinking about my social security number, and that’s pretty amazing in and of itself.”

“In and of.”

“Okay, let’s see... what am I thinking of now?”

“The Goonies. You wish they made a sequel. Okay, now you’re feeling afraid. And now you think I’m a witch or something. That’s actually a good guess.”

“You’re a witch and vampire?”

“Kinda. Though I’m primarily an energy vampire, I’m sort of getting back my witch mojo, so to speak. Long story.”

“What’s happening?”

“Oh, did you think I was kidding when I told you that I was a vampire?”

“Um... I think you are a mind reader or something.”

“Not quite, bub. I’m a walking, talking vampire and witch—well, minor witch. I guess I’m also kind of the angel of death, too. But don’t worry, I mostly just kill demons. I say mostly because I’ve recently killed some dark masters, but that’s a whole other story.”

“Jesus.”

“I’m definitely not him. And in case you’re wondering, crucifixes never worked on me, though my now dead ex-husband—who is a lowly evolved dark master now possessing my son in a parallel world—had tried to use them on me. He was scared of me. Still is, I think. Which is kinda strange to say, since I cradled his dead body in my arms a few years ago. But I didn’t kill him. A rival vampire did.

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